I want to be desperate for the Word. I want to want the Word every minute of everyday no matter what the cost. But life happens: lists at work have to be done, the house has to be clean, errands have to be run, TV shows have to be watched… you get the picture. I am not alone. As much as I want my life to be bible saturated and gospel centered, so easily I become distracted. There is no excuse.
I have been reading the story of a Chinese Christian Brother Yun. The book is called “The Heavenly Man.” Here is his account of his pleading for a bible…
From that day on I earnestly wanted to have a copy of my own Bible. I asked my mother and fellow Christians what a Bible looked like, but no one knew. One person had seen some hand copied Scripture portions and song sheets, but never a whole Bible. Only a few old believers could recall seeing Bibles may years before. The Word of God was scarce in the land.
I was so hungry for a Bible. Seeing my desperation, my mother remembered an old man who lived in another village. This man had been a pastor before the Cultural Revolution. Together we started out on the long walk to his home. When we found him we told him our desire, “We long to see a Bible. Do you have one?”
He immediately looked fearful. This man had already spent nearly 20 years in prison for his faith… He felt compassion but still didn’t want to show me his Bible… If caught with a Bible, it would be burned and the owner’s whole family would be severely beaten in the middle of the village.
The old pastor simply told me, “The bible is a heavenly book. If you want one, you’ll need to pray to the God of heaven. Only he can provide you a heavenly book. God is faithful. He answers those who seek him with all their heart.”
I fully trusted the pastor’s word.
When I returned home I brought a stone into my room and knelt down on it every evening for prayer. I had just one simple prayer: “Lord, please give me a bible. Amen”. At that time I didn’t know how to pray, but I continued for more than one month.
Nothing happened. A bible didn’t appear.
I went back to the pastor’s house again. This time I went alone. I told him, “I’ve prayed to God according to your instructions, but I still haven’t received the Bible I want so much. Please, please show me your Bible. Just a glance and I will be satisfied! I don’t need to touch it. You hold it and I will be content just to look at it. If I could copy down some of the words I will return home happy.”
The pastor saw the anxiety of my heart. He spoke to me again, “If you are serious, then you should not only kneel down and pray to the Lord, you should also fast and weep. The more you weep the sooner you’ll get a bible.”
I went home and every morning and afternoon I ate and drank nothing. Every evening I ate just one small bowl of steamed rice. I cried like a hungry child to his heavenly father, wanting to be filled with his Word. For the next 100 days I prayed for a Bible, until I could bear it no more. My parents were sure I was losing my mind.”
God finally gave Brother Yun a Bible. Sitting at my desk right now I have 3 bibles. At home on my bookshelf I have at least 4 more, not to mention the endless supply of resources I could find on the internet. I don’t have an excuse. We don’t have an excuse. It must be apathy, or a hard heart. Maybe it’s pride, arrogance, or self sufficiency. Maybe it’s unbelief.
If we truly want to know and become like Christ (Phil 3:10), and we believe that Christ is the Word (John 1:1), and believe that we are sanctified through the Word (John 17:17) there should be no disconnect. Our time should be spent lavishing in the word.
Lord, may our delight be in the law of the Lord. May we meditate on it day and night. Make us like trees planted by streams of water which yield fruit in season and whose leaves do not wither. (Psalm 1:2-3)